Preservation of The Soul and The Retrogrades, lol + Collective Reading
I’ve been trying for like two weeks at this point to get this stuff straight in my head so that I could put it out here for someone to read. It’s been annoyingly complicated coming to understand something that is relatively simple, getting things piece by piece, having to understand it from my perspective before I can understand on behalf of another, you know, the whole dramatic thing. Recently, like just a few days ago, I managed to get things to click and I present to you two questions:
(1) What lies are you telling yourself right now?
(2) What dreams or fantasies is your logical mind currently throwing to the wind?
Over the last month or so, while doing shop readings and such, I kept coming across the same exact pattern over and over again, something pointing to an involuntary slow-down or pause in the personal life of the individual, which we’ve had come around before, but this time it was all pointing to an external “preparation” occurring on a higher level. From what I could see for a few other people and myself, there is an intern disconnect that is someone purposefully placed through a higher disconnect with external guidance and the Higher Self. It’s not a full complete cut or anything, just a very thick wall separating the levels of awareness for the sake of allowing the higher aspects to get things in order for something, physical or just energetic, that will be occurring on a mass scale, affecting the collective.
There’s not really anything that needs to be done consciously regarding this “preparation,” but there is something that can, and for some, should be done in order to maintain momentum and a certain level of stimulation around anything that may be on pause right now. For some people, this was coming up as an opportunity to refine things that are already in place, for some an opportunity to reconnect and revive old aspects that have been tossed to the side, and for others, this is an opportunity to completely redefine the identity and in that rebuild foundations. Love a good bit of foundational work, especially during strong retrogrades, don’t we?
So, anyway, I was super confused about all of these personal readings for other people, a total of 12 or 13, all starting off with the exact same baseline reading regarding a pause in relation to higher levels of preparation. It spooked me a bit because nothing was really clear about the preparation aspect, so I did the only thing I could think of an inquired about it for myself and my own personal setbacks that I’ve been dealing with. This took a few days because, again, highly disconnected from my Guides currently and things just kept coming in piece by piece, had to connect dots and shit, you know. Two things came up — self-identification, and an aspect of refinement that was continuously, over and over again, referred to as “preservation of the soul.”
Again, this isn’t something that goes right in line with the preparation thing, it’s more so something to do to keep the energy flowing and to make sure it’s flowing in the right direction so that whenever the preparation thing is done and everything is ready to move again, everyone is kind of lubed up and ready to move with it. This is about holding our vision and recognizing ourselves consistently as creators, even when we can’t see things coming to form physically right in front of us. It is about reminding ourselves of our control over both our internal and external worlds.
A few days after I got the bit about the “preservation of the soul,” which haunted me tremendously by the way, I had a very interesting and very vivid dream about it. In this dream, I was giving a speech to local officials in my area advocating for art programs in schools. I was talking about how committing to preserve a child’s sense of autonomy and expression would help them to recognize their potential as creators, the control and influence that they have over the world around them, how they are part of that system’s evolution, not just its sustainability. This gives them a sense of pride and purpose when it comes to everything and anything that they put their name on, pride and purpose in their identity as a whole, as individuals with unique perspectives and expressions. They become more committed, develop more integrity in their work as they get older, they become more innovative. I finished off this ranty speech with this idea that preserving a mindless workforce is great for the economy, but preserving the soul is great for the future in its entirety.
That is something that a good chunk of us have to really work on now as a lot of what has happened this year has pulled us so far out of ourselves that we have lost our vision, lost our sense of control, and ultimately lost a strong connection and understanding of our soul. A lot of us need to work on refining and reconnection, maybe not directly through physical action and creation but through the stimulation of the Water realm, of the vision itself, the energy behind it, the passion that we will eventually feed back into it on a more superficial level.
For me, personally, all I want to do right now is work on stuff for the blog and the youtube channel, but everything that I need in order to do that has just kind of slipped away and left me just sitting here a lot of the time. That’s my involuntary pause in a very superficial, externally-oriented system that I had going pretty strong and was very committed to. Recently, out of pure boredom, I decided to open up my ~novel~ that I’ve been working on since 2015, just to read through it a bit, and suddenly I was just writing it again. I haven’t touched it since April of last year apparently, but it just started going and everything started clicking, at least in terms of the purpose behind my specific setbacks. This story of mine, my little novel (which is at 528 pages currently, wtf) has absolutely nothing to do with what I want to be doing, it serves no purpose, it doesn’t make money, it doesn’t help anyone, BUT a giant chunk of my soul is in there and I was really falling back into a lot of things while reading and writing through it. A lot of bad stuff, yeah, but substantial stuff, very full stuff that I could grab onto and feel in a way that I haven’t been able to feel in a long time and I was like, oh yeah, this is what it feels like to actually be proud of something, this is what it feels like to be excited about just turning a vision into something physical and not being so focused on outside expectation or judgment.
I used to have that feeling for stuff with the blog and with the new youtube stuff, but it faded away so slowly over a long period of time I really didn’t notice it was completely gone until I was able to feel it again within something private and totally unrelated, which I was only brought to do after everything else become impossible. Funny that, innit.
But that’s the whole point, it’s the benefit of reconnecting through the soul, specifically through vision, reconnecting to the soul through aspects of Water when Air, Fire, and Earth are not completely in working order. For a lot of people, this was coming up as creative work of some kind, whether it be something physical like painting or writing, or something more internal, like just dreaming, fantasizing, holding that vision in your view enough to stimulate the energy around it. For some people, it was about bringing past projects, past ideas, things that were rooted in the soul back to the surface to be worked on or expanded, or overlaid into the current system that you have planned out for yourself.
Another thing I was seeing for everyone collectively was this idea of as you stimulate the Water realm, as you really focus there and focus on the internal world, there comes a chance for cleansing and clearing that happens automatically. It’s almost like really strong Cancer energy where that Cardinal Water, the boiling water, the stimulated water bounces around so much that all of this stuff just starts popping out. Heavy emotions, subconscious blocks, insecurities, fears, all of that kind of stuff just starts coming up and getting released because so much is going internally. So much new energy is being created internally that all of the unnecessary and heavy stuff just has to go, and it seems to happen naturally. You still feel it of course as it moves through, but it moves through rather quickly.
What is left behind there becomes like a template, or a guideline based on only the best aspects of your inner world, only the most rewarding and fulfilling elements for the soul are there and they help you to actually refine or rework the external function, how you go about things, your perspective on your own life, your sense of control.
This all really goes together well with the Mars Retrograde in Aries and the Mercury Retrograde in Scorpio, a pullback in the personal will, identity, logical mind, and deep inner emotion. This is a great time to create but to create only for the self with the intention of allowing the deeper parts of your soul to speak so you can connect to it better. It’s a good time to return to old projects, especially creative and innovative projects that you left behind some time ago. Keep the Water flowing, keep the internal world stimulated, realign with your vision, and remind yourself of your role as a creator and the control and influence that this role gives you internally and externally. It can be a heavy and frustrating time, but it can also be one of the most liberating when you come out on the other side.
Collective Reading
Focusing on: Mars Retrograde (September 9, 2020 - November 13, 2020) from 28° of Aries to 15° of Aries, and Mercury Retrograde (October 13, 2020 - November 3, 2020) from 11° of Scorpio to 25° of Libra. Line those degrees up with your personal birth chart and focus on the house that these retrogrades fall in, as well as the planets that they interact with through conjunction, if any.
*These mini-readings are divided by elements, you can look at your Sun and Rising Sign, as well as your Mercury and Mars if you feel called to do so. It covers the timeframe from now to mid-November when Mars goes direct.
Water Signs (Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces)
Overall Energy: Divine Feminine — “The frequency of Divine Feminine supports our receptive, nurturing, and soft side, allowing it to express itself openly and helping us to connect to our intrinsic understanding of our connection to all of creation.”
Internal Guidance: North Node — “Step out of your comfort zone.”
External Guidance: Wombat Spirit — “Be at home.”
I thought this was a pretty interesting set to start with for Water Signs as the main focus here is aspects of the Divine Feminine, the inner world, receptivity, and intuition. It gives a vibe of there being more ease and flow if you actually do move into more internal focus in this timeframe. Even more interesting, the internal guidance, the soul, calls for you to step out of your comfort zone, or in this case, the soul is calling for exploration, a classic deep-dive through a Mercury Retrograde in Scorpio that will allow you to discover, open up, and clear parts of the inner world that you may have forgotten about or never really connected to before. Along with that, the external guidance, your Guides or the Universe as a whole, collectively calls for you to “be at home,” or to separate yourself from the external and superficial, to be at home within yourself, to really focus on the internal world.
This feels like it’s presenting an energy that carries a wide-open space for a lot of very beautiful growth and healing, as long as you do move into that space and focus more on yourself, focus more on personal healing and reconnection.
Fire Signs (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius)
Overall Energy: Heart Chakra — “The frequency of the Heart chakra — the green Flower of Life — supports our capacity to love deeply and unconditionally. Its healing properties harmonize the mind and the body.”
Internal Guidance: New Moon in Pisces — “Meditate and contemplate.”
External Guidance: Scarab Beetle Spirit — “Magic works through you.”
Fire Signs may have the most to gain out of this experience or may have the most noticeable progression and expansion over time, especially the Fire Risings. With that New Moon in Pisces card lining up with the Scarab Beetle, and focusing in on the Heart Chakra, it really feels like something very unexpected but ultimately perfect is going to come into your line of sight when you enter and explore the realm of Water, the internal world.
Of course, Fire Signs can sometimes find it intimidating to move into the realm of Water as they, the leaders carrying the torch, are entering a space where their torch will be extinguished and they will essentially be alone for most of the journey. With the message of “meditate and contemplate” coming from your internal guidance, your soul, there is a reminder to find your center, find your pride, your passion, your strength, your sense of leadership, and through that find your light, find your torch. The image of the Pisces New Moon shows the two fish as if they are emitting light themselves, and that’s how you should visualize yourself while moving through deeper aspects of your awareness. You’re never really in the dark, you never lose any aspect of your Fire essence. Your Fire is not something that you hold, it is something in your heart, or the Scarab Beetle suggests, it comes from within, it moves through and projects from you, allowing you to be a source of illumination and guidance for yourself when you need it.
Be brave with your inner world, anything and everything you see there is just a different version of you.
Earth Signs (Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn)
Overall Energy: Root Chakra — “The frequency of the Root Chakra — the red Flower of Life — stimulates passion and supports our sense of security on this physical plane, both in our bodies as well in the physical world.”
Internal Guidance: Waning Moon — “What do you need to release?”
External Guidance: Coyote Spirit — “Trust in divine detours.”
Similar to the Fire Signs, it can be intimidating or uncomfortable for strong Earth energies to move into the realm of Water as there can be an over-awareness of the fact that with heavy Water stimulation, the Earth can turn to mud, losing its stability and form. If not mud, then there’s a chance that the Earth will just dissolve completely into the water, turning it dark and murky, making it even hard to navigate than it was to begin with. Keep in mind, however, that in their most balanced states, Water and Earth come together to create clay, something that can be formed and molded into any creation. It is important to be in touch with your own Water as if you allow yourself to become to rigid, to set in a certain way with no flow, someone else’s Water may start to move through you, form you, and dictate your creation without you even realizing it.
The Root Chakra is a major key here for you guys, both literally as well as symbolically. I was thinking more about a tree with deep roots that are held steady and nurtured by the Earth, and sustained by Water. Help yourself connect to your own creation, your balanced soul, your clay by grounding through your Rooth Chakra. Reconnect with the physical Earth, the planet Earth by extending roots from your Root Chakra down to the very core of the planet. Visualize yourself as a tree, held and cared for by both Earth and Water. Connect and ground to your own body in this manner as well. When it comes to answering the question of “what do you need to release?” you may find the answers for yourself as you start to feel through your body, and feel through your energy, finding certain twists and turns that don’t quite feel right, or certain blocks that are holding your roots back from expanding or soaking up water. Allow the heavier matters to sink down into the Earth and away from you, and through Water soak up lighter, more fulfilling, and stimulating energies that can clear and energize the inner world.
Your Guides have collectively made the note of “trust in divine detours,” or better yet, don’t be too stubborn when the process moves outside of the guidelines of the original plan that you may have for this process. It’s a matter of balance and co-creation at times. You are a tree. Your trunk is strong, stable, straight up and down without any deviation, but your roots and your branches have to twist and turn in any and every direction to reach the water and the sunlight. Those are the potential detours, the potential bends, and breaks in the process of expansion and illumination, ones that are necessary and beneficial.
Air Signs (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius)
Overall Energy: Throat Chakra — “The frequency of the Throat Chakra — the blue Flower of Life — support our self-expression and our sense of peace and balance.”
Internal Guidance: First Quarter Moon — “Your commitment is being tested.”
External Guidance: Giraffe Spirit — “See the big picture.”
This here is really about reconnecting to the core, the Air core on a very conscious level, which may need to occur before you fully take the plunge into the deeper aspects of the inner world. It is calling for a clean-cut detachment from external focuses that may have dragged all of your attention and energy outside of yourself either through direct action on your part, or just observation. This is calling for you to come back to your Air core, and create a higher, more “enlightened” space to observer the external world without being fully absorbed into it, to the point where you feel as though you are at the mercy of the ups and downs of the physical world.
Collectively your Guides are prompting you to “see the big picture,” to zoom out of the fine details of the outside world that pertain to you and your life specifically, and see the rhyme and reason behind it, see the patterns and logic that go into the seemingly chaotic ups and downs. This, at the very least, can bring some people ease and comfort in recognizing the patterns and potential can bring back a sense of control. Being hyperfocused on one or two specific issues, problems, in your life, especially ones that are less reliant on personal will and more reliant on external things falling into place, can distract from the purpose of the slow-down or pause that is being presented now. Maybe something has been taken from you and you notice it more because you can see the blank spot in your physical reality, in your home, in your friend group, in your schedule, but what has been given to you internally to fill in that space? Did you even know there was an equal exchange happening there? You may need to zoom out completely externally, find yourself, and then zoom way in internally in order to find your answers, find clarity, find purpose in the situation, but it is there.
“Your commitment is being tested,” as presented by the internal guidance, the soul, is referencing a commitment to a personal vision, the image, the path, the blueprint that you created for yourself in the internal world and perhaps forgot about or severely altered in order to accommodate more superficial aspects that were outside of your realm of control. The new vision, the new structure for some may be lacking integrity as it has no solid internal foundation. It needs to either be reinforced or the previous vision, the soul’s vision needs to be brought back up to the surface and projected into the external reality through that higher perspective where you can line things up with the patterns of physical reality, making it easier to balance and play out your vision, your creation for yourself.